I'm Happy In Being Sad!!!

So I'm sad a lot. Not always but a lot, and I've always been ashamed. I pretend I'm happy. I work on it, go to therapy, but life's hard and sometimes it's a shitbox of nonsense and woes, and then I met this guy. We've just become friends. He's an easy-going type, not someone who passes judgment much. He tells me he needs a good deep melancholy here and there. It makes him feel human. He asks me if I might prefer being sad. I said no straightaway, but then I had to admit I do, sometimes. At the very least it means my heart's open. I'm alive and feeling even if it's not the circus and birthday and balloons kind of stuff. I've been trying to talk myself out of it for years, but what I didn't know is that you can be happy being sad.